Who’s Waldo

Posted byembrace-the-suck.blogPosted inUncategorized

August, 2021

Decades before a cartoon hiker became a search object in books of crowds, I was crowned with an unusual, but ultimately useful nickname. One look at our email address, whaldeaux23@yahoo.com, shows how useful this nickname can be.

Now don’t get me wrong. I love Bob as a nickname. It has only three letters, is spelled the same backwards as forwards, and connotes a guy who lives in a perpetual state of slack. Not only that, it’s versatile, useful in both business and casual settings, and easy to teach to infants learning to talk. Everyone knows a Bob. Its ubiquity, however, can be its downfall. When half a dozen people stand up when Bob is called in a crowded restaurant, you know it’s time to give the host person a different name.

So how did I come to be called Waldo? It all started with a backpack trip during high school. We were sharing a bottle of whiskey that we should not have possessed with some fellow degenerates on a group trip. One of the degenerates said that I looked like the eldest son in the TV sitcom Nanny and the Professor. He got the characters mixed up, and instead bestowed on me the name of the family dog. One guess what the family dog was named. It must have been the whiskey. So that was my name for the duration of the trip. And it would have stayed there were it not for a miscalculation on my part.

Fast forward to high school summer chemistry. Remembering that backpack trip, I started calling one of my friends in my workgroup Waldo. Why I did this to my friend Greg is lost on me now because he neither looked like the eldest son in the TV sitcom nor the dog. I guess it was one of those high school things.

The end of summer brought the beginning of marching band season. I made the grevious error of calling Greg Waldo. To understand the nature of this grevious error requires an understanding of marching band dynamics. When marching, even when not playing, the drum section keeps the band in step. When just marching into position, the drum section would keep us together with drum cadences, short rhythmic pieces designed to keep us synchronized. Drummers, however, are mischievous creatures. We had a cadence that enabled the band to yell the F word, and another one where a cymbal would be outstretched to enable it to be played as a ride. In more ways than one, the drum section drove the band.

Guess what section Greg was in.

When I stupidly called Greg Waldo in front of the drum section, they would have none of it. My goose was cooked. Soon the whole band was calling me Waldo. In a short time, following a campaign stimulated by the band’s drum major, t the entire school was calling me Waldo. I had no choice but to embrace it.

Fast forward to law school and yet another miscalculation.

At the conclusion of our intro week, all of us first years headed out to a local watering hole to get better acquainted. Everyone is introducing themselves when a Ken doll look alike butts into my conversation and says, “Hi. I’m Tony. What’s your name?” Remembering that goofy name I had in high school, I turn to Tony and, in a voice dripping with sarcasm, say, “My name is Waldo.” Wrong answer. With a mischievous glint in his eye, Tony takes it upon himself to run around the room and butt into conversations with some variation of “See that guy over there? His name is Waldo.” I was forced to once again embrace the Waldo.

In time, I established strong friendships with people who simply didn’t know my real God given name. One, a prominent anesthesiologist, called a law firm at which I was working and asked for Waldo. When informed the firm did not have an attorney named Waldo, he described me as tall, thin, and wired, and I got the call.

St. Laurel likes the name because with one shout she can always find me in a crowd. Depending on what people call me, she can place how I know them. And she is the proud commander of the Team Waldo care team.

So now you know. You can now call me Waldo to your hearts desire. Even if it all started with a dog.

See you next time.

16 thoughts on “Who’s Waldo”

  2. I love your writing and I love your stories. This answers a lot of questions for me! Our son is Robert who was Robby when little, then Rob and now is Robert. Since he was named after Rick’s father, who was a Bob, our Robert was never a Bob. Honestly, I like the name Robert best of all and you will never be a Waldo to me, except in my mind while I am remembering this story and chuckling.

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  3. I love that story Bob. I can imagine what it’s like being in a group of people and calling out a reservation for a popular name like that. When I went to elementary school at Montclair there were three Janets in our class and so two of us got nicknames and I was called Pedie which lasted well through my college years with my close friends and sports team members. At work however I went by Janet. So now I have friends who know me only as Janet from work and friends who know me only as Pedie. I bet for those people that only know you as Waldo you would think it odd for them to call you Bob and vice versa. I know it would seem very odd for a friend that knows me only as Pedie to call me Janet. So here’s to you and the Waldo team headed bye Saint Laurel.

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  4. There must be a bit more to the story, for your email address is waldeaux23. Surely there were not so many waldo people on Yahoo three decades ago that you could not have been waldo99! Or were you just trying to be more sophisticated … on “Yahoo”?

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  7. When the “Ken Doll Look Alike named Tony” introduced you to me in Law School as “Waldo”, I thought that was your name. It was a “special” and “unique” name. But, you definitely appeared to be both “special” and “unique”. So, I had no great difficulty accepting it as your name. Until I later learned that at Cal you went by the name “Bob”. Then I was confused.

    Nevertheless, I still thought of you as “Waldo”. Until I later learned that your email address was “whaldeaux”. And, I became more confused, thinking that I had always misspelled your name because I thought of it as “Waldo”, not “Whaldeaux”. I have maintained that level of confusion all of these years until today when I received this Embrace-The-Suck post wherein you use the spelling “Waldo” and tell us the dog origins story.

    But, as other Commentators have already mentioned, you now have a topic for the next week’s Post….explaining the “Whaldeaux” vs. “Waldo” conundrum and also how THAT relates back to the dog!

    Speaking of dogs…Thank you for the Pavlovian Training. Every Friday afternoon I now start getting antsy about noon. I am usually watching my “Inbox” constantly, excitedly anticipating the arrival of this week’s “Embrace-The-Suck” Post. It usually arrives around 3 PM. I know this. I await this. Each week!

    One week you totally ruined my day. I kept checking and checking my Inbox. But, no Embrace The Suck Post arrived that day. That evening, I was depressed. I was concerned about you.My imagination was running wild with all kinds of explanations and excuses for why you failed to post on that particular Friday. So, I went to Woody’s Wharf, my favorite watering hole. The bartender at Woody’s asked me why I was so down. I told him that you had failed to deliver your Friday afternoon post that day, which I always expect to receive about 3 PM.

    Then the bartender reminded me that he works the Thursday night shift! Not the Friday night shift!

    I hoisted a few for you that Thursday night!

    —Jamie…One of your Pavlov’s Dogs!

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  8. Excellent bit of the history of the legend…and you do look like the older kid who on the show was named Hal. Just think if the backpackers had gotten the name right…Hal and Bob…together at last! Keep them coming, amigo!

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  9. Waldo, thanks for the whole story about how you became Waldo I am guessing
    the drum cadence with the F word was before I got there direct the band I hope. Hang in there buddy, you guys had a great sense of humor

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    1. Rory, I’m quite sure that the cadence with the F word began during your tenure as band director. And ended during it too, as I recall that you banned that cadence rather quickly. It was originally written with two points where all the drums would rest, and the band would chant rhythmically in their place – first ‘hey!’, then ‘hey hey!’. But somebody came up with the idea of substituting more provocative phrases with the same number of syllables.

      P.S. Did you ever find out who threw that string of firecrackers off the back of the equipment truck?

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  10. A prominent anesthesiologist? I don’t know that I deserve such a nice accolade. Regardless, u will always be waldo in my book!
    Love u my dear friend!
    Alan

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  11. what a talent you are Waldo, what pleasure you bring to your ever expanding world of friends, were we as clever, or as humorous, we too would be able to craft a tale like this. Thank you. Jeanne

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  15. Like Jamie, in law school you were introduced to me as Waldo. (I’m pretty sure you were the one doing the introducing!) I can’t even remember learning your birth name until close to graduation. For many years after law school, when other attorneys in San Jose referred to you by your birth name, it would take me a while to realize they were talking about you! LOL. I do remember your telling me that you acquired your nickname in high school, but I had never heard the story. Silly me for thinking it might have had something to do with people wondering where you might have gone off to. Thanks so much for sharing this story! And thanks so much for making me smile again and again and again. Lucy

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